I just made out with a guy for $7.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
it was like his penis was on wheels.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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