Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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