Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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