I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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