i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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