i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
