What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
