Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
