So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
worst night to have a conscience
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
If I die, sorry about rent.
Randomize
