nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
