Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Randomize
