hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize