There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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