She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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