Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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