Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
