mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
