You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
