Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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