I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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