i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
