'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Randomize
