from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
