New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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