Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Randomize
