he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
do herpes really smell.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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