They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
