Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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