I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
