I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
