Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
How naked do you want me to be?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
