hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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