Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
high people should be assigned attendants
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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