It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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