Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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