i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
