We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
She told me I should be a condom model.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
