Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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