then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
