I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
