He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize