Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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