69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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