Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Blood and glitter go together right?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
