Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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