I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Everyone says I win the strip club
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
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