they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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