ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
false alarm. still invincible.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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