If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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