Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
