idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
