WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
